Funniest Joke!

Mentally Unstable

Mentally Unstable

Member
#21
#21
Turner Brown

A skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees
this HUGE African American guy standing next to him. The big guys sees
the little guy staring at him, looks down and says: "7 feet tall, 350
pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pound left testicle, 3 pound right
testicle,...Turner Brown."

The small man faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big guy
kneels down and brings him to, shaking him. The big fellow says, "What's
wrong with you?" In a weak voice the little guys says, "What EXACTLY did
you say to me?" The big dude says, "I saw the curious look and figured I'd
just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. I'm 7
feet tall, I weight 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch penis, my left testicle
weighs 3 pounds, my right testicle weighs 3 pounds and my name is Turner
Brown."
The small guy says, "Turner Brown? Thank God! I thought you said
"Turn around."
 
Mentally Unstable

Mentally Unstable

Member
#25
#25
The 25 inch penis

A man with a 25-inch-long penis goes to his doctor to complain that
he is unable to get any women to have sex with him - They all tell him
his penis is too long. "Doctor," he asked in total frustration, "is there
any way that you can shorten it?"

The doctor replied, "Medically, son, there is nothing I can do. But, I do
know this witch who may be able to help you." So the doctor gave him
directions to the witch.

The man calls upon the witch and relays his story. "Witch, my penis is
25 inches long and I can't get a woman to have sex with me. Can you
help me shorten it?"

The witch stares in amazement, scratches her head, and then replies:
"I think I have a solution to your problem. What you have to do is go
down to a pond, deep in the forest. You will see a frog sitting on a log,
who can solve your dilemma. First you must ask the frog: 'Will you
marry me?' Each time the frog declines your proposal, your penis will
be five inches shorter."

The man's face lit up and he dashed off into the forest. He called out
to the frog. "Will you marry me?" The frog looked at him dejectedly
and replied "NO!" The man looked down and suddenly the penis was
5 inches shorter, "WOW," he screamed out loud.

"This is great! But it's still too long at 20 inches, so I'll ask the frog to
marry me again. "Frog, will you marry me?" the guy shouted. The frog
rolled the eyes back in its head and screamed back "NO!"

The man felt another twitch in his penis, looked down and it was
another 5 inches shorter. The man laughed. "This is fantastic. But 15
inches is still too long." He reflected for a moment. "Just a little less
would be ideal," he thought. Grinning, the man looked across the
pond and yelled out, "Frog will you marry me?"

The frog looked back across the pond shaking his head in disgust,
"How many times do I have to tell you? NO! NO! and for the last time
NO!"
 
C

cubegal

New Member
#27
#27
Joke one:

Three men sat in a hospital lobby
Man1: Man... I'm so nervous... X.X""
Man2: Me too... Why're you here?
Man1: My honeh's giving birth to a baby...
Man2: Mine too!
Man1: *notices Man3* Hey, why's that guy trembling..?
Man2: Oh, him? He's wife is giving birth too... And he's nervous... Waaay too nervous.
Man1: o_O""
A nurse comes out of door one, Man3 yelps slightly. Nurse blinks at Man3 before turning to Man1.
Nurse: Congratulations! Your wife had TWINS!
Man1: Eh..?!?! What a coincidence!! I work in Twin Tower! XDDDD
Man1 grins and follows nurse to a ward to visit his wife....
Meanwhile, with the other two....
Man3: *trembles trembles trembles... Shivers*
Man2: *thinks* I hope he calms down soon... =.=""
A second nurse comes out and Man3 screams. He soon stops when Nurse2 gives him a weird look. Nurse2 turns to Man2.
Nurse: Congratulations sir! Your wife had TRIPLETS!
Man2: What a coincidential thing! I work in the Triple WWW!
Man3 whimpers as Man2 follows Nurse2 to another ward.
A third nurse came out to be met with a hysterical man on the edge of screaming himself hoarse.
Nurse3 blinks confusedly as Man3 screams, : NOOO!! MY WIFE IS NOT GOING TO GIVE BIRTH TO A MILLION KIDS!! I DON'T WORK IN THE MILLIONATION COMPANY!!!! D8888<<<<<<

Joke 2:

A man enters a room for a job interview.

Interviewer: Name?
Man: Abdul Aziz
Interviewer: Sex?
Aziz: 6 times a day.
Interviewer: *sputters* Wha-? No, no. I meant; Male or Female?
Aziz: Male, female, dogs... Everybody!
Interviewer: *speechless*.... Isn't that too HOSTILE?
Aziz: Eh.. Horse style, dog style... Any style!
Interviewer: ........ *foams in the mouth*
 
M

Maq_daddy

Member
#30
#30
Ok here's one.... kinda old so u guys should know it... its kinda long but good too!!

During a skirmish one night a cowboy got dismounted from his horse and was dragged back to the indian village. The Chief of this tribe, being in a generous mood decided to grant the cowboy three last requests before he was to be killed.

Early the next morning the chief asked the cowboy for his first request. The chief was surprised when the cowboy asked to see his horse, though he ordered the horse to be brought to the man. The cowboy grabbed the horse by the left ear and whispered something to it. He then slapped the horse on its rear and the horse ran off. Later that evening the horse returned, carrying on its back a beautiful blonde woman. The villagers laughed to themselves as the cowboy took the woman into his tent for the night.

The next morning as the woman left, the chief asked the cowboy for his second request. To their surprise he again requested his horse. This time the cowboy grabbed the horse tightly by the right ear and whispered something to it. He slapped the horse and it ran off again, only to return later with a beautiful brunette. As usual the cowboy took her to his tent where she spent the night.

As the sun rose and the brunette scurried off, the chief came to the cowboy asking for his third and final request. In desperation, the cowboy once again asked for his horse. All the villagers broke into laughter, though the chief upheld his request. This time the cowboy was mad, so when the horse arrived, he grabbed the horse by both ears and screamed "Possy damnit, I said Possy!!"
 
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