The title explains itself: "Why I Fired My Secretary."
Two weeks ago, was my 45th birthday, and I wasnt feeling too hot that morning anyway. I had my breakfast, knowing my wife would be pleasant and say Happy Birthday and probably have a present for me. She didnt even say Good Morning, let alone Happy Birthday. I thought, well, thats what a wife is. The children will remember. The children came into breakfast and didnt say a word either. So when I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet said, "Good morning, boss, happy birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon.
About noon Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know its just such a beautiful day outside and its your birthday, lets go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, thats the greatest thing Ive heard all day. Les go." We went to lunch. We didnt go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, its such a beautiful day. We dont need to go back to the office? Do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Lets go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment, we had another martini and smoked a cigarette and she said, "Boss, if you dont mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." "Sure," I excitedly replied.
She went into the bedroom and in about six minutes, she came out... Carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife and children. All were singing Happy Birthday.
... And there on the couch I sat... with nothing on but my socks...
Two weeks ago, was my 45th birthday, and I wasnt feeling too hot that morning anyway. I had my breakfast, knowing my wife would be pleasant and say Happy Birthday and probably have a present for me. She didnt even say Good Morning, let alone Happy Birthday. I thought, well, thats what a wife is. The children will remember. The children came into breakfast and didnt say a word either. So when I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet said, "Good morning, boss, happy birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon.
About noon Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know its just such a beautiful day outside and its your birthday, lets go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, thats the greatest thing Ive heard all day. Les go." We went to lunch. We didnt go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, its such a beautiful day. We dont need to go back to the office? Do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Lets go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment, we had another martini and smoked a cigarette and she said, "Boss, if you dont mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." "Sure," I excitedly replied.
She went into the bedroom and in about six minutes, she came out... Carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife and children. All were singing Happy Birthday.
... And there on the couch I sat... with nothing on but my socks...